There's a plethora of things we declare we will do once we grow up and own our own house. We'll have a West Elm navy blue sofa, slather all our walls in charcoal grey paint, host sophisticated dinner parties with three courses cooked lovingly, and proficiently, from out of the Nigella cook book. We'll own a table runner, scatter cushions, Tupperware and cake forks. Napkin holders, mugs without chips.
We'll grow herbs and radishes and rambling roses in our very own garden, with a summer house at the bottom which will become our office, once we finally ditch our job and go freelance. Steadily taking over the world from our Ikea work station, with self-closing drawers – when we're all grown up and own our own house.
But top of the list above all of this domestic paraphernalia is the wish, the hope, the life-fulfilling statement, that one day when we're all grown up and have our own place, we'll have a pet. A miniature Schnauzer, a long-haired Dachshund, a pair of rescue kittens of indeterminate breed but no less-loved. An iguana, a Bichon Frise.
Because the crushing blow, the reality check, is that without a pad of your own, just a rented place, you will find it immensely tricky, a torturous process, to convince your landlord to allow you to have a pet. The reason being – pets mean mess. Scuffed furniture, an endless sea of shed hairs.
The Labour party hope to change all that. They want to make it the default position for all tenants to be allowed a pet unless there is concrete evidence that said pet would be a nuisance. The move comes as part of a whole package of proposed animal welfare measures that the red party would put in place, they claim, should you cast them your vote in the next election.
They are the animal welfare party they declare and have drawn up a draft 50-point policy document to prove it headed “Animal Welfare for the Many not the Few”. Other plans include ending the badger cull, closing loopholes which permit illegal fox hunting, reviewing animal testing. Phasing in a ban on all fur imports and outlawing foie gras – as they say, a policy for the many not the few.
Labour hope the plan will attract the growing number of people who they recognise are having to rent well into their 30s, with the proposal to strengthen the right of tenants to have pets in their homes as their star turn.
Not a bad idea considering the closest most renters get to a couple of kittens gambolling around the place is the leopard print Leo trainers from Hush. They will not welcome you at the door when you come home from a long day at work or snuggle up with you on the sofa whilst you catch up with the latest episode of the Great British Bake Off. They do however look great with black skinny jeans.