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The Waitrose healthy food police and Amber Rudd's L K Bennett heels

"The next time you're at the checkout and you hear the beep (bip-bip) think of the fun you could be having on Supermarket Sweep."

Good old Dale Winton and there could be no better time to quote the Supermarket Sweep legend, now sadly departed, than today, as we arrive here at the supermarket. Grab a trolley - no not that one, it's got a shonky wheel - and let's get browsing the aisles.

The reason this reporter has brought you here is because she wants to chat with you about Waitrose's plan to install 'health food police' on its shop floor.

The well-to-do supermarket chain is training up some of its sales assistants as we speak, to linger in the aisles and encourage customers to ditch the junk food and make healthier food choices instead. The drive will be rolled out across dozens of stores this year and comes after a Waitrose survey found half of shoppers did not feel they had time to focus on their health.

Waitrose has reassured that its healthy food experts will only dish out advice to customers who ask for it but this reporter already has visions of these 'experts' staking out the crisp aisle and tutting rather loudly as a customer loads a bumper pack of Walkers into their basket.

Speaking of shopping, this leads us nicely to a discussion on the latest 'completely disconnected with anything that real-life has to offer' (must think of a snappier title) statement from our glorious MPs, in the form of Home Secretary Amber Rudd's comparison of the online EU registration system to shopping at LK Bennett.

Now this reporter doesn't wish to be presumptuous but she is quite sure that the luxury high street shoe and clothing chain, frequented by the likes of Kate Middleton and Theresa May, is not quite on the radar of those EU nationals seeking to remain in the UK after Brexit. Indeed the store is probably not in the lexicon of everyday use of the majority of people who have lived in the UK all their lives.

It is akin to when a few years back David Cameron, as Prime Minister, was asked by a young boy what the inside of the House of Commons looked like and he replied it was a bit like a school. Right on the money when it comes to reference points we all sighed.

Ms Rudd's gaff is no different. Indeed campaign organisation, The 3 Million, which represents EU citizens living in the UK said they had to Google L K Bennett, and also quite rightly accused Ms Rudd of trivialising the application process.

Because it would not be a huge leap of association to worry that the current scandal over the citizenship of the Windrush generation could rear its ugly head again in 50 years time from now when it comes to the legality of former EU citizens being allowed to remain in Britain.

Ms Rudd and Theresa May have made much noise this week about 'allowing' people whose origins lie in Commonwealth countries to be fast tracked through the registration process without having to pay the fees or pass the British citizenship test, but as MP David Lammy has quite rightly pointed out, this act on the part of May and Rudd to look like they are benevolently exercising compassion towards these people is flawed on so many levels.

From the fact that the Windrush generation were declared British citizens as soon as they were invited here under the 1948 British Nationality Act and so are now having to reclaim their rights rather than gain them, to the reality that these people have lived and worked in Britain longer than many of us have been alive and so if it comes down to claiming Britishness, they are arguably more British than a whole portion of the British-born population.

There is a distinct whiff of condescension in the air today don't you think, on all fronts?

This reporter suggests it only fitting to purchase a pair of L K Bennett stiletto heels, in the name of research. But tread carefully at the online checkout. You may find that whilst the purchase goes through with ease in the here and now, you may get a knock on the door in 50 years time asking you to give those high heels back - no matter how much you argue they are rightfully yours.

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