Skip to main content

The Frida Kahlo Barbie, uncompromising dress codes and something fishy

This reporter is relieved to discover she is not the only human being perturbed by the decision to bring out a Frida Kahlo Barbie.

The feminists of the world gave a great cry of glee at the announcement that the contentious doll manufacturer had brought out a new range of modern day and historical heroes. This includes the aforementioned artist Frida Kahlo, alongside the first female to fly solo across the Atlantic Ocean, Amelia Earhart, pioneering mathematician Katherine Johnson and boxer Nicola Adams.

The dolls were brought out as part of celebrations for International Women's Day and have been praised for gazumping the usual stereotypical tottering, pink Barbie and giving girls dolls with more meat. Covering a whole range of nationalities and backgrounds - they are the ultimate in inclusivity.

This reporter however, did not understand the positivity to be had out of something akin to Barbie appropriation. We have been told for decades that if young girls spend their childhoods playing with Barbies they will end up with the inspirational reserves of a mayfly, merely spending their lives seeking out their Ken and their favourite shade of sickly sweet lip gloss.

So why, this reporter asked, were those who had previously expressed such uproar against this spindly piece of backward-thinking plastic now taking this doll and moulding it into something which, rather than resembling something better, now resembled Barbie in a series of wigs?

Fortunately, this reporter is not alone as first thought. Not only has Frida Kahlo's great niece come out and slammed the doll purportedly in her aunt's likeness, for looking absolutely nothing like her, but actress Salma Hayek, who played Frida in the film of her life, has weighed in saying immortalising the unique artist in Barbie plastic goes completely against what she was about.

In more local news, residents are affronted because they have not been targeted by a mobile fish van scouting out wealthy villages.

Homeowners are urged to be on the lookout for the suspicious looking white van being driven by devious thieves posing as door-to-door fish sellers, in order to assess whether you have anything worth robbing.

Villagers have been heard to declare they are sorely put out by not receiving a knock from these counterfeit fishmongers, decrying that they do indeed have plenty of stuff to nick. As they tell everyone on a regular basis, their home is a veritable Aladdin's cave for burglars.

This reporter would like to add, that these thieves, to be spotted driving around villages in an altogether innocuous white van emblazoned with a kipper, have failed on one crucial point, and that is ensuring they do not look fishy.

The Royal Ascot dress code has been released for all of us still agonising over what to wear for the big event in June and it appears we are going to need a more accurate tape measure.

The archaic dress code is just as strict as ever. For women, dresses or skirts must hit a minimum of just above the knee, while dress and top straps must measure at least one inch in width. Bright colours are forbidden as are off the shoulder, strapless and halterneck garments.

Men must wear black or grey morning dress involving a waistcoat, tie, black or grey top hat, black shoes with socks. Cravats are not permitted, nor is the customisation of top hats with coloured ribbons.

So, this reporter has checked and double checked the dress code and she thinks she's cracked it. She's going to be wearing this the Dundas one shoulder tiered ruffle mini dress in neon pink. Appropriate for Royal Ascot and for Barbies, as she concludes, we still don't quite know where we stand with them.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Stranded in Brexit Britain - A Taco Sauce Survival Tale

WITH three weeks to go and about as much readiness as you can fit into a Borrower's knapsack, the pressing question remains, who is going to stop Brexit? The obvious candidate, not to go all Rees-Mogg on you, is the Queen. Who in theory, if not in practise, has the power and from previous allusions, thinks Brexit a load of piffle.
Failing the Queen, who let's face it has her hands full as a member of the sandwich generation - wrangling the car keys out of Prince Philip's mitts on the one hand and helping Meghan practise for her hypno-birth, on the other. If the Queen is not available there are "dupes" for her.
Victoria Beckham is to deliver a Queen's Speech on "Christmas Day" in March to launch her YouTube channel, on basis these speeches are "quite popular" and as we are constantly reminded by those around her, Mrs Beckham is witty and self-deprecating. Highlights will include her rallying cry to get people to subscribe to her channel: &q…

Corbyn's Phoney People's Vote, Pot Shots and Gigantic Bows

FROM Corbyn's phoney call for a People's Vote and the cliffhanger pot shot video tape, to the Roksanda blouse with the enormous bows, welcome to This Reporter's weekly news and style round-up.

Cadbury can only be a sugar rush away from filing a trademark infringement against the British government (to wit - the "Crunchie") as the political world of farcical doom entered yet another of its relentless crunch weeks. Providing, of course, the Crunchie bar was packed from first bite instead of with honeycomb, space dust, and instead of with space dust, TNT and instead of with TNT, nuclear active garbage just 29 days away from detonate, because that's about where we are with Brexit.
Prime Minister Theresa May is under the mistaken impression that the best way to avoid cataclysmic disaster is to dodge it. Colloquially known as "the swerve". As that is exactly what she has done over the meaningful vote - part numero deux - on her deal, which was due to take…

Bercow Bans Brexit Vote 3, Tram Shooting and the Tortoise Illusion Cake

FROM John Bercow banning a third Brexit vote and another suspected terrorist attack - this time on a tram in Utrecht - to the ultimate in tortoise illusion cakes (spoiler alert: it wasn't a cake) welcome to This Reporter's daily news round-up.

Some have called it a massive spanner in the works, others a "constitutional crisis", whilst those more scholarly types have plumped for "Erskine Mayhem". Either way we are all talking about Common's Speaker John Bercow making the "shock" announcement yesterday (Monday) he was banning Prime Minister Theresa May from putting her Brexit deal before Parliament for meaningful vote a third time, unless it underwent substantial changes.
What Mr Bercow appears to have done is got the PM on an historical technicality. Quoting from the guide to parliamentary procedure, Erskine May (no relation to our leader) he said the Commons could not be "repeatedly asked to pronounce" on the same question.
Inevitabl…

Brexit Crisis, Boris "Spaffed" Johnson and Prince Charles' Beach Bod

FROM MPs' dawning revelation that yes, Brexit is in crisis and Boris Johnson's leadership bid "spaffed up a wall", to Prince Charles' "impressive" beach bod, welcome to This Reporter's daily news round-up.

"It's like the last days of Rome". A direct quote there, which shows at long last MPs have cottoned on to what the rest of the country/Europe/the world could have told them months and months (and months) ago -  Brexit is at crisis point.
Prime Minister Theresa May herself admitted that things were not going quite according to plan yesterday (Tuesday) and, to be frank, exiting the European Union on 29th March (next week) probably wasn't going to happen.
But instead of taking some form of useful action to try and sort this crisis out, she has decided to make a move which will only takes things from shockingly bad to unfathomably worse. This Reporter refers to Mrs May writing to EU Chief Michael Barnier to request only a short exten…

Brexit: Where's Barbara Cartland's magic acorn when you need it?

THERE are no words - quite the technical hitch when it comes to writing - to do justice to the single greatest political calamity of our generation. This Reporter considered instead using expressionist art or shadow puppetry. She would make a concerted effort at it for five minutes before setting fire to the whole damn lot - as symbolism.
As alternative, let's start with the bare-boned facts of the matter. Prime Minister Theresa May lost her second meaningful vote on her Brexit deal in Parliament on Tuesday night by a stonking 391 votes to 242. Not the complete annihilation of meaningless vote part numero one, but still an almost unprecedented disaster.
David Cameron, tracked down at his lair, said: "I don't understand why MPs who have always wanted Brexit keep voting against it". Well David, sometimes people do the most unfathomable of things don't they. But back to the facts.
Mrs May's promise of votes on No Deal and Article 50 extension are coming up next.…