Skip to main content

Germaine Greer on "naked" Beyonce, Ruby Tandoh on food snobbery and the Khaite wool bodysuit

Please hold caller.

Excuse this reporter one moment. She's just got to take this call. You see, she's set herself up a little sideline - 'This Reporter's Fashion Helpline", an emergency hotline for all your sartorial problems, big and small.

Yes, sorry. How may this reporter help you?
Uh huh, uh huh, uh huh. Yes. I understand. Yes. The daisy square neck wool bodysuit by Khaite. Yes absolutely, guaranteed. Not a problem. Call again soon.

Apologies for that. Just took a call from "In a Flap" from Blackburn. She's been struck down by the fashion trend for tucking in everything, including the chunkiest of knitwear, into the waistband of her jeans and its left her feeling as though she is about to pop.

This reporter told her she sympathises. We never used to have this trouble in this reporter's day. Indeed, we'd do anything to avoid being tucked in, including detention and lines after school. Now for the youth of today it's a case of get tucked in, or get out - from the thinnest T-shirts to the thickest of jumpers, it all needs to be wedged down the front of your high waisted, fray hemmed jeans, despite this (or perhaps because this) leaves you with the legs of a stork and the teeny tiniest of bodies floating around on top.

Fortunately the 90's revival of the bodysuit is back in trend, which allows you, with the click of a few carefully placed poppers to look effortlessly tucked in. This reporter's even spotted this woollen number by Khaite which negates the bulky jumper situation quite nicely.

It also doubles up as a splendid leotard should you sense a Beyonce moment coming on - and who doesn't from one time to another - but just don't tell Germaine Greer.

The arch feminist, who appears to be milking her current slot in the spotlight as society's greatest provoker, for all it is worth, has now criticised Beyonce of "Halo" fame for putting on a "sexual display" in her stage outfits.

She questioned why the pop star, who she says has a beautiful singing voice " as clear as a bell" has always got to be naked. "I'm not saying you have to keep your clothes on," Germaine continues. "But why is sexual display part of the job? I might as well ask that question to a barmaid who says she doesn't get any tips if she doesn't show cleavage".

Ms Greer goes on to criticise female athletes asking why they always have to be naked. She cites the example of female figure skaters who are clothed in just "a few wisps of cloth and the man is in evening dress". Greer claims nakedness is usually a sign of submission. It's a sign of inequality.

This reporter concedes Germaine is not wrong about any of this but to voice this conundrum is akin to taking the bottom block out of the precariously built Jenga tower that is entertainment.

Elsewhere, Ruby Tandoh - who found fame crying doe-eyed tears at Paul Hollywood during a past series of The Great British Bake Off only for it to turn out, to the great joy of everyone except Hollywood, that men were not entirely her thing - has spoken out about having to ditch her lucrative Guardian newspaper food column due to the inherent snobbery in the food industry.

"The stuff that makes the headlines again and again is toxic and elitist and supported by truly rotten foundations", declares the highly eloquent, and uncensored, baker and writer. She went on to explain in a 'thread' on Twitter that those with less money are often made to feel ashamed for being unable to afford costly, supposedly nutritious products, and made the point that processed foods are not always as damaging as they are made out to be.

She cited there were people "slagging off convenience foods all around, professional fatphobes at every level and not a scruple in sight. I really tried, but I'm out."

"As much as we all owe it to each other to do good in the world, I can't shoulder this burden - it's too big", she added.

This reporter suggests the Guardian and its ilk just weren't read for her (Hartley's) jelly.


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

All aboard the pizza ferry, headed for absolutely nowhere new

THIS Reporter wishes to express her fathomless thanks to the Westminster crew, none of whom decided to take upon themselves the tired old trope of making new year's resolutions - on off chance a better version of themselves existed - and instead continue in the exact same farcical way they blundered through 2018. Because despite the fact ministers had, in theory, laid their dispatch boxes on beds of tinsel for the duration of Christmastide, there is still much for us to catch up with. First, but by no means foremost, Sajid Javid, Home Secretary - who it has reached This Reporter via the rumour mill likes to call himself "The Saj" - perhaps short for Sergeant but more likely, Sajid - cut short his luxury £1,000-plus a night safari festive break in South Africa to rush back and deal with what he coined a "migrant crisis" but in reality was two brave souls casting out across the Channel in a rubber dinghy. Nevertheless, Javid called for immediate clampdown on th

Meghan and Harry "grin in the rain" and the Kimono-wearing fox killer

FROM Meghan and Harry making their first appearance in the UK together since Megxit, to the kimono-wearing fox killer who appears to have been cleared of all crimes, these are the news headlines according to This Reporter on Friday 6th March 2020. Yes that's right, This Reporter is declaring this particular news gathering outlet a Coronavirus free zone as we kick off today's headlines with the news Meghan and Harry, otherwise known as the Duke and Duchess of Sussex, have returned to the UK and had their photograph taken together, under an umbrella, in the rain. The couple were in town - London specifically - as they wind up their official duties before bowing out of royal life forever, with last night's paparazzi extravaganza related to their attendance at the Endeavour Film awards. With what we can only assume were fixed grins on their faces as they braved the weather, and the fact these moments under the media spotlight, were exactly what they were talking about when

Life is a Brexit Waltzer - You Just Gotta Ride It?

WHEN it comes to rip-offs we are being urged this week to look no further than Prada's white cotton T-shirt, retailing for £270. This Reporter states this does rather, in her opinion, overlook a more glaring and ever present rip-off in our lives, which we will look at more thoroughly in due course. But back to the T-shirt, and words have been voiced over why any right thinking human would purchase the extortionately priced Prada T-shirt when there are all manner of identical alternatives available on the high street? "You get what you pay for" is the mantra from fashion disciples. However, in that case surely we can expect no less than the whole cast of Enid Blyton's magical Faraway Tree involved in the workmanship, weaving well-being and fortitude into every seam. The perfect antidote to the sweatshop. But then we are told over at Primark you can buy a pair of socks and come away with a free human bone. Admittedly that wasn't the original Primark marketing str

Rudd's resignation, Trump's visit and Kat Von D's indestructible eyeliner

You better watch out. You better not cry. Better not pout. I'm telling you why. Donald Trump is coming to town. More about that later. First, some serious news. (This reporter puts on her most sensible of news reading glasses). The Guardian reports today (Monday) that Amber Rudd has "dramatically" resigned as home secretary after "repeatedly struggling to account for her role in the unjust treatment of Windrush generation migrants." The documenter of our times continues: "The home secretary was forced to step down after a series of revelations in the Guardian over Windrush culminated in a leak on Friday that appeared to show she was aware of targets for removing illegal migrants from Britain. "The pressure increased late on Sunday afternoon as the Guardian revealed that in a leaked 2017 letter to Theresa May, Rudd had told the Prime Minister of her intention to increase deportations by 10 per cent - seemingly at odds with her recent denials that

BAFTAs, Alabama, "Four Ovens" and Jeremy Kyle

FROM "Killing Eve" cleaning up at the BAFTAs and the rise of Nigel Farage's half-baked Brexit Party, to the trash found at the depths of the ocean which, according to some reports has Jeremy Kyle living under it, to "Four Ovens" MP James Brokenshire, if this week was a grossly out-dated, misogynistic trope, it would be a domestic goddess. All complaints please back date to 1957, where you'll find the Senate of Alabama mulling over their next Gilead-inspired motion. Welcome to This Reporter's Weekly News Journal. Monday 13th May and   get your glad rags on - or not (we'll get to that in a moment) - because our first stop is the BAFTAs where "Killing Eve" cleaned up on the night like any good assassin would, scooping awards for best drama series, best actress and best supporting actress. This was despite chat over whether the programme should have been included in the awards night at all. Some bother about it being screened over in America