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Tonsils, cacti and purchase of the week - the beach bag

"Oh I do like to be beside the seaside, oh I do like to be beside the sea..."

Do you remember the good old-fashioned cool box? The big chunky plastic container with the extractable white handle, which came with two blue ice blocks you had to put in the freezer overnight before any planned picnic or trip to the beach?

This reporter finds herself yearning for the return of one of these retro contraptions as she is bombarded with the news that a designated beach bag is considered de rigueur for any trip to the seaside now.

What's the panic, I hear you exclaim? Just find your old tote bag or canvas carrier and chuck all your belongings in, letting them mix shamelessly with the sand of last year's trip. No my amigos that simply won't do. The fashion world decrees we must splash the cash on a bag specifically purposed for these days out - the words beach and bag are no misnomer.

Vogue, as always, has a list of bags to take pride of place on your beach lounger. This reporter suggests, if you are going to shell out, go for this Rebecca De Ravenel She Sells Sea Shells basket bag. It makes no bones about our predicament.

Meanwhile if you haven't died of over-consumption yet, there's a good chance you will die of that, or any other virus you may pick up, very soon if you have had your tonsils out. According to health experts, a child risks infections, skin ailments, lung complaints and eye problems for life if they have had a tonsillectomy.

At best they will suffer more from common colds and respiratory problems but may also fall foul of around 28 more serious infectious diseases. The removal of tonsils and adenoids in the throat occurs when they are obstructing breathing or the child suffers repeated bouts of tonsillitis and middle-ear infections. However they also play an important role in the early immune system blocking the invasion of bacteria and viruses into the lungs and throat, it has recently been found.

The authors of this latest study, conducted in Australia, say alternatives to surgery should be considered but this reporter wonders what the likes of her are expected to do? Go and track down the charred remains of their own tonsils to the hospital waste incinerator where they were discarded and pop them back in?

All I can say is good job we are going to be sweltering from now until eternity in this 'blissful' bout of extended hot weather, as a much-needed distraction. This summer is predicted to be the hottest in 12 years and garden centres have already proved the winner of this year's unseasonably warm May.

Everyone, without exception, it appears has been trotting down to their garden centres to load up on blooms and garden furniture, all the better to bask in these unprecedented balmy temperatures. And even the millennials are doing their bit for the garden centre coffers, thanks to their new obsession with taking photos of cacti and other succulents for their instagram posts.

Notcutts and their like are breathing a huge sigh of relief for this unexpected boom in hot weather-induced garden love, following the snows of earlier in the year which left them faced with near destitution.

With everyone spending so much time in their gardens this summer it looks like that trip to the beach may be off after all but this reporter couldn't help digging out the cool box for old time's sake. And she thinks she's just found her tonsils.

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