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Big Brexit House in the Country and Vetements glow in the dark trainers

Readers - the news is cracking on apace. What with Big Brexit House in the Country, four out in Thai Cave Rescue, England going through to the World Cup semi-final and breaking: David Davis exiting Brexit, we must dive in without further dismay, sorry, delay.

And it had been looking surprisingly (suspiciously) good for our Prime Minister Theresa May when all her Cabinet agreed to her soft, cherry-picked, have your cake and eat it, Brexit during an away day at her country pad, Chequers, on Friday.

Bar the slight technicality that this was exactly the sort of plan the EU had warned they would reject out of hand and the fact Mrs May had threatened her ministers with having to take public transport home should they fight against her "collective responsibility" whip, the most Mrs May had to deal with was Boris Johnson saying "well you can't polish a turd" and even that was ambiguous in its direction - whether a comment on the Brexit plan or Mrs May herself.

In manner of rat escaping sinking ship it was Brexit Secretary David Davis who decided, in the early hours of Monday morning, to hand in his resignation. In what comes across as an "it's not you, it's me" style letter to the Prime Minister,  he claimed he could not deliver a Brexit he did not believe in.

The newspapers are reporting this has left the government in "complete and utter chaos". Many elsewhere are puzzling over what loss the man who spent a grand total of four hours negotiating with Michel Barnier over Brexit in the last year, and appears to be neither enthused by or up to the Brexit challenge, will be.

The killer question for today (Monday) is, how is Mrs May going to see her way through this one and, perhaps more pivotally, who will be exiting the Big Brexit House next?

There is news on Thai Cave Rescue. Four boys out of twelve who became stranded, along with their football coach, after the cave they were in became flooded, have so far been delivered to safety.

Parents are camping out on site in the hope of being reunited with their children who have been down in the caves for nearly two weeks. Brave British divers have today returned to the caves to try and free the remaining eight boys and the coach before monsoon rains hit and make exiting an impossibility for months.

There appears to be no bad feeling between the coach or the boys' parents who have been exchanging letters through the wonder of modern technology.

The apparent accidental poisoning of two people with Novichok in Salisbury has turned into a murder case after one of them, Dawn Sturgess, died. Ms Sturgess and her partner Charlie Rowley - who remains in a critical condition - were poisoned with the nerve agent last weekend after, it is believed, coming into contact with an object missed during a massive clear-up of the town following the attempted assassination of Russian spy Sergei Skripal and his daughter Yulia earlier in the year.

Counter terrorism officers are investigating, although there appears to be some hesitance to blame Russia this time round. This reporter wonders if this is something to do with...

The England football team is blazing a steady trail towards bringing the winner's cup home after beating Sweden in the quarters finals of the World Cup tournament, being held in Russia (RUSSIA), at the weekend.

The England squad will now face Croatia in the semi-finals after the Croatian team rather miraculously beat the hosts Russia (RUSSIA), who this reporter was sure were a shoe in for the final. (Not to say, for legal reasons, Russia would have rigged the competition in any way).

Of course there are always those England fans who have to let everyone else down - namely those who thought it fitting to celebrate beating Sweden by jumping on the beds in their local branch of Ikea. This reporter is certain 'Daddy' Southgate would not approve.

And finally, operating in a blissful vacuum away from football chants and Brexit condemnation, we have Claudia Winkleman's style column for The Sunday Times, in which she recommends we all purchase a pair of, "stop you in your tracks", glow in the dark trainers.

She states not since giant crumpets has there been a greater invention than a pair of Vetements trainers, which due to their 'glowing' credentials, can never be lost in the back of the wardrobe again.

Perhaps the government could each do with a pair, because at this rate, in the, slightly modified, words of Lucy from 'The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe', it looks like it's "always going to be Brexit, Brexit but never Christmas" here.






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