Skip to main content

Summer Riots, Eskimos and Camping It Up at the MET

THERE will be riots on the streets if the Government continues to roll out its controversial Universal Credit benefits system. That is the warning from former Prime Minister Gordon Brown who predicts a return to poll tax-style chaos and a summer of discontent if Theresa May does not call a halt to the scheme.

The Universal Credit system combines six benefits in one and is set for a full national roll out next year, despite countless reports of claimants already on it being plunged into dire financial straits as a result.

Mr Brown said: "Surely the greatest burning injustice of all is children having to go to school ill-clad and hungry. It is the poverty of the innocent - of children too young to know they are not to blame". This Reporter comments, it really must be a sign of the times, that Gordon Brown returning as Prime Minister seems a welcome idea.

Moving on and President of America, Donald Trump has declared his daughter Ivanka would be "dynamite" as the next UN Ambassador. This follows Mr Trump losing yet another member of his inner team this week as Nikki Haley resigned from the role on what is being portrayed as amicable grounds, but amid reports Ms Haley has her own sights set on the the 2020 President-ship.

Trump rambled on that there was "no one more competent in the whole world" than Ivanka to fill the position but he would be accused of nepotism if he pushed her forward. That yes - or the fact the very thought of the Trumpian dynasty having yet more powerful reach, is just too much to stomach.

Brexit is apparently reaching it final "frantic" stages with an intense line-up of meetings planned for next week to firm up the deal to present to the EU at the October Summit. The small question remains to the population at large what exactly that plan will look like as MPs continue to squabble.

What is really cheering is there is still so much positivity in the air - watch your step over that puddle of sarcasm - as Westminster is currently advertising for a team of "resilience workers" to help the country cope with the fallout of Brexit. They will be paid an annual salary of £50,000 and will initially be employed until June 2019 but "with the possibility of extension or permanency". This Reporter's advise to them -  don't make any plans.

North and South Korea are working on a unified dictionary after more than 70 years of division has left them with glaring vocabulary differences. Whilst technically the North and South speak the same language they use different words for a whole variety of things. For example whilst in South Korea, which has taken more words from English, a couple would talk about "going on a date", in North Korea they would call it "going for a walk" - confusing if the date involves sitting down.

In the South they say having an ice-cream. In the North it is called an "Eskimo" (which incidentally should replace ice-cream in all dictionaries). The move to bridge the language divide follows a reapproachment between the two leaders after three summits this year.

Finally fashionistas you need wonder no longer, as the MET Gala theme has been announced for 2019. The mega fashion event which takes place in New York in May each year gives countless celebs the chance to outdo each other at fancy dress and this time around will be based around "Camp" - the highbrow version. As taken from Susan Sontag's seminal essay "Notes on Camp", which argues for camp being the love of the unnatural, of artifice and exaggeration. It's certainly a step-up from tarts and vicars.


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Life is a Brexit Waltzer - You Just Gotta Ride It?

WHEN it comes to rip-offs we are being urged this week to look no further than Prada's white cotton T-shirt, retailing for £270. This Reporter states this does rather, in her opinion, overlook a more glaring and ever present rip-off in our lives, which we will look at more thoroughly in due course.
But back to the T-shirt, and words have been voiced over why any right thinking human would purchase the extortionately priced Prada T-shirt when there are all manner of identical alternatives available on the high street?
"You get what you pay for" is the mantra from fashion disciples. However, in that case surely we can expect no less than the whole cast of Enid Blyton's magical Faraway Tree involved in the workmanship, weaving well-being and fortitude into every seam.
The perfect antidote to the sweatshop. But then we are told over at Primark you can buy a pair of socks and come away with a free human bone. Admittedly that wasn't the original Primark marketing strat…

A Full Lashed Brexit Compromise, the Magnum-only Diet and Boiler Suits

FROM a Brexit Backstop compromise guaranteeing full fluttering lashes and the Magnum-only diet, to the post-Brexit fashion must-have, the boiler suit, welcome to This Reporter's weekly news and style round-up.

We commence with gutting news for MPs, as it was announced this week the Commons recess, due to begin on 14th February, would be cancelled to allow more time to sort out Brexit. Concerns were naturally aired over child care - not for MPs; but their children (it coincides with school half-term holidays) - but the real "heart breaker" is for the medley of members who had booked their annual skiing holiday, in Europe presumably. Let's pause a moment in our communications to allow the irony truck to pass on by...
Word has it, some MPs still intend to go on their holidays. Not Chris Grayling, banned from Calais, for yet again exercising the IQ level of a broad bean, by failing to let Port Chief Jean-Marc Puissesseau know of his plans to divert boats to other ports i…

Russell Brand's "World View" and the Continuous Brexit Loop and the Continuous Brexit Loop...

COMEDIAN Russell Brand's interview with the Sunday Times has got the country in a tailspin. The gist concerns Mr Brand's "world view" - as he puts it - of being a "sensitive, awake and aware man", clashing, quite considerably, with his responsibilities as a father. To the point, he shamelessly conceded, he'd barely looked after his own children alone in any given 24 hour period.
To quote: "I'm very, very focused on the mythical connotations of Mabel's beauty and grace. Not so good on the nappies and making sure they eat food. When I looked after Mabel on her own, she dropped two social classes."
Mr Brand appears to seek praise for his decision to opt out of parenthood's contractual obligations as though he is akin to a bad driver taking himself off the road (#PrincePhilip). But for those considerate people, there is the train.  For Mr Brand, there's ending up looking a berk.
Sixty-four days to go until we leave the European Uni…

A Continental Knock and Run and "Timeless" Beige

FROM breakout filmic hits "The Great Chimp Escape" and "A Continental Knock and Run Part 436", to the surprising allure of "timeless" beige, welcome to This Reporter's weekly news and style round-up.

"Is this hell Prime Minister?" cries a heckler as Theresa May meets with Jean-Claude Juncker. Even before "that" happened, it was always going to be a tricky meeting between Mrs May and EU chiefs in Brussels, as the PM trudged fruitlessly forwards in yet another bid to get them to agree to solve the Irish Backstop problem for her. And all to allegedly appease those back at home in Government, who are getting far too much enjoyment out of egging on their weakest classmate to repeatedly "knock and run" the front door, of a renownedly fearsome neighbour. Zilch, as always, was resolved.
"Give me a little more time", pleaded Mrs May as MPs began to fret over when they would get to have their "meaningful vote" i…

Rudd's resignation, Trump's visit and Kat Von D's indestructible eyeliner

You better watch out. You better not cry. Better not pout. I'm telling you why. Donald Trump is coming to town.

More about that later. First, some serious news. (This reporter puts on her most sensible of news reading glasses). The Guardian reports today (Monday) that Amber Rudd has "dramatically" resigned as home secretary after "repeatedly struggling to account for her role in the unjust treatment of Windrush generation migrants."

The documenter of our times continues: "The home secretary was forced to step down after a series of revelations in the Guardian over Windrush culminated in a leak on Friday that appeared to show she was aware of targets for removing illegal migrants from Britain.

"The pressure increased late on Sunday afternoon as the Guardian revealed that in a leaked 2017 letter to Theresa May, Rudd had told the Prime Minister of her intention to increase deportations by 10 per cent - seemingly at odds with her recent denials that she w…