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Unlikely Lovebirds and Boris Books in Some Attention

PITY the Boris Johnson. He has barely had a shout out in the press this week amidst all the Brexit commotion. This Reporter envisions his fingers just itching to get to his typewriter keys to bosh out an extra scathing tome on proceedings, in time for The Telegraph's Sunday edition.
But what's this - joys springs eternal, as we hear that Mr Johnson has been hauled in front of Parliament to apologise for the hapless transgression, of taking "too long" to declare £53,000 in earnings from his books.
A damning report to the Commons Committee on Standards said Mr Johnson took an "over-casual attitude" to parliamentary rules and should apologise. The worst bit about this - the reminder Boris "writes" books.
Mr Johnson, basking in the spotlight, intoned the delay had been "unintentional" but offered the house a "full and unreserved apology" - and many thanks for giving him some much-needed attention.
A donkey and an emu who fell in love on an abandoned farm in South Carolina, have been given the chance to live out the rest of their days together, after being adopted by a celebrity.
Jack and Diane were in danger of being torn asunder after being saved, along with a number of other animals, from the farm in November. Until 'The Walking Dead' star Jeffrey Dean Morgan stepped in and said the pair could live together at his farm in New York, following an appeal on social media.
The animals were said to become distressed when an attempt was made to separate them - crying and pacing around - and when they were put back together they snuggled up to one another. Actor Morgan said he could already see how much the donkey and the emu were in love.
Food Banks are not photo-ops, lambasted Labour Leader Jeremy Corbyn as he tried to pull Prime Minister Theresa May back to the reality of the world this week from the quagmire of Brexit. Mr Corbyn was referencing a plethora of photographs that have been circulating on social media of Tory MPs visiting their local food banks. In way of offering a supporting arm to constituents who had been plummeted into poverty, of arguably, the Government's own making.
Mr Corbyn additionally pointed out The Trussel Trust has already warned food banks face record demand this December. Mrs May in response continued to work on the basis of denial, by quoting her own choice variation on the stats - that absolute poverty was at a record low.
Following a complete inability to agree on either the format or even the station for the Brexit television debate, there won't be one this weekend. Both Mrs May and Mr Corbyn certainly put on a good show of being willing to fight out the key elements of exiting the Union in front of a Sunday night audience.
But after failing to firm up a single detail in time, both the BBC and ITV have pulled the plug on the event for them. Many have commented that the wrangles over the TV debate have played out the thwart central issues of Brexit, on the microcosm. Which raises the interesting possibility that Brexit itself could conclude with an anti-climatic plug pulling.
Feel in need of some escape, then join the queue, as the post of warden has become available on a tiny island off the Guernsey coast which comes with its own natural swimming pool. The successful applicant for the job will have the whole of Lihou to themselves, living off grid and surrounded by the Atlantic Ocean. Duties will include maintaining the 500 metre island's only house and looking after the wildlife on the nature reserve.
As always, however, there is a sting in the tail. Which comes in form of the historical knowledge Lihou was used for target practise, by occupying German soldiers, during World War Two. And the way things are going on the global stage, This Reporter's not sure she'd risk it.

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