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Streatham Terror Attack and the World's Worst Cat

FROM a terrorist attack on Streatham High Road to the "world's worst cat" finding a home, This Reporter brings you the news headlines on Monday 3rd February 2020.

A man was shot dead by police after stabbing two people in Streatham, London on Sunday in what was swift labelled a terror attack.
Sudesh Amman, 20, had left prison just days before the attack outside Boots the Chemist on Streatham High Road, which left one passer-by initially in a life-threatening condition and another treated for minor injuries.
Amman had served part of his three year and four month sentence for the possession and distribution of extremist material but had been deemed sufficiently high risk that he was under special monitoring by police.
Indeed a notepad recovered from his home in 2018 contained a list of "life goals", top of which was "dying a martyr", and second - to the best of This Reporter's knowledge - buying a juicer.
The Baftas were held last night (Sunday) with war film 1917 the big winner, scooping awards for best film, best director for Sam Mendes, sound, special visual effects and others it would be too tedious to list here.
Joaquin Phoenix came away with the best actor award for Joker and took his opportunity under the spotlight to throw some shade at the Baftas for its alleged lack of diversity.
Quite the day for Mr Phoenix, as earlier he had joined animal equality protesters on Tower Bridge where he issued a plea for people to go vegan. The actor, who has been vegan since he was three, said the industry consumed a lot of power and resources - famous types jetting off to film locations and the like - and maintaining a vegan lifestyle was a way for him to "mitigate that".
And so it begins. Less than 24 hours after we officially exited the European Union, with Prime Minister Boris Johnson, it transpires, bonging a teeny tiny gong the size of a side plate on the stroke of 11pm, "Brexit Day" posters were pasted up on all the fire doors of a block of flats in Norwich, demanding all residents either speak the "Queen's English" or go home.
To quote direct from the poster (typos eradicated for coherence): "We are now our own country again and the Queen's English is the spoken tongue here. If you do want to speak whatever is the mother tongue of the country you came from then we suggest you return to that place and return your flat to the council so they can let British people live here..."
The incident at Winchester Tower is being investigated by police under the heading "racially aggravated".
And finally, in what can only be termed a standout piece of reverse psychology, a cat at an animal shelter in North Carolina who workers branded a "jerk" and the "world's worst cat" on social media, has found herself a home.
Perdita, or Noel as her new owners insist on calling her, known at the shelter for her stroppy demeanour, looked like she was never going to be adopted until the shelter decided to run a marketing campaign emphasising her deficiencies.
And whether it was a case of rising to the challenge or they were looking for a cat with a penchant for "lurking in corners", a couple from Tennessee fell for her hook, line and sinker.
So buoyed are they by their "clever" piece of marketing, the animal shelter is aiming to extend this method to other cats in its care, including Edgar, a rotund orange tabby, who shares an affinity for "reaching out and touching someone", and to This Reporter, sounds alarmingly like Donald Trump.

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